Novpm09 25, 2008
DRAG THEM TO HELL
On that night, when Bastusang Pambansa held a marathon session to pass House Resolution 1109, the possibility of non-president bitch whore (that’s right. No need to pardon my French, it’d be my second language for this piece anyway) sitting tighter than ever in Malacanang stalked us like a thief in the night.
The act alone of railroading a questionable and refutable resolution that attempts to change the very foundations of Philippine society where basic rights and liberties are drawn is scandalous enough, to do it with a sense of urgency despite opposition and more so ignoring public opinion is a slap in the face.
There is no compelling or pressing need to amend the Constitution right now, certainly not with these monkeys in the seat of power. What baffles me up to this day however, is how the hell this fake government pull off these things with such ease? And how come nobody or only few seems to care? Everyone seems to be busy with their usual routines on the net. Ah, there and then you realize it’s not just the government that is dysfunctional, the whole nation is. There goes apathy and indifference toward our ailing nation. Lest we forget, the government we’re up against is one deeply entrenched in corruption. Sitting and waiting for change to happen while airing complaints left and right wouldn’t be enough. Heaven help us if we don’t act now.
On the issue of rallies being supported by certain trapos, why should you let them stop you from registering your voice? It’s not about Erap, JDV or whomever. Hindi naman yan rally para iluklok sila agad sa pwesto. It’s against the Constitutional bastardization and Gloria’s extension. Linaw-linaw naman.
In these rotten times, we should all try to look beyond personalities and start acting objectively about what needs to be done at the moment. The idea that “everybody cheats anyway” is moronic. At the very least, if so, then it’s time we stop it. Otherwise, why bother having elections? Why not just appoint GMA president for life? Yes we deserve the government that we vote but guess what, they cheated last election right? The few who may have voted intelligently have been robbed of that vote for goodness sake. And even if your candidate didn’t win in that election, the truly educated one knows that it is not where the real triumph lies. People who feel violently oppressed in mind rather than in body, who has been gripped by the hand of tyranny up to his very soul has EVERY right to defend themselves.
So what now? Silence can be an acquiescence. And principles carry a price, often a rich one. But they carry a reward too, that of peace of mind.
Question is, can you possibly take this level of outright shit flung right in your face?
*originally published June 9, 2009
Maypm09 25, 2008
The criminal is right behind you, Jun.
photo from Leah Navarro
I am indignant. Seeing Jun Lozada being dragged away in broad daylight for an alleged crime of perjury and people just shrug their shoulders, sighing that’s just the way things are in this country. And now Mike Defensor who brought the charge of perjury is appealing to the public to understand him as he was just trying to vindicate himself. What’s there to vindicate, Mike? Have you seen you lately? Filing a charge and then flying off to US to watch the Pacquiao-Hatton fight rather than follow the proceedings from here? I almost threw my slippers at the telly.
The authorities couldn’t have picked a better time. They could have done it next week but right now is just perfect. Juday-Ryan wedding, holiday Friday thus the long weekend, the “president” will be abroad and everyone will be focusing on the Vegas prize-fight Sunday. By then, news on J.Lo’s arrest would have gone stale.
In this country, absurdity piles up on absurdity. Imagine these: the Court of Appeals overturning the rape conviction of Marine Lance Cpl. Daniel Smith saying that what happened between him and Nicole was ‘a spontaneous, unplanned, romantic episode’, Jovito Palparan being introduced as representative of the people, Secretaries, Chavit Singson and Lito “Gumamela” Atienza behaving like issues of national defense and environment respectively, is secondary only to their multi-million bet in Vegas. All that in a span of almost just one month. Now the sad truth is, hindi ka binabangungot. Your biggest nightmare happened last 2004 when ‘Ate Glo’ called Garci to make her win by one million votes which to me, is the biggest crime of all.
Febpm09 25, 2008
The Importance of Being Earnest About Being Single
Dear Self,
Remember how you celebrate Valentine’s Day as single? Well, keep doing it! 
For V-day 2009, I won’t be disparaged by admitting that I was alone again, naturally as Gilbert Sullivan is. I share myself with those who like me, is single but not wary for the most part. And at the risk of small prejudices, still found themselves flexing those romantic muscles a little, wearing hearts on sleeve.
I used to romanticize the beauty of not knowing and constantly subjected myself to series of brief and irritating hopes. I have never been more guilty of being addicted to the exquisite pain of wanting the unattainable and all the while being too coward of realizing my own dreams not only because I wouldn’t know what to do with it but also, I’m not sure if I’m even equipped to handle it. Besides, I thought I am entitled to my own misery just as I let everyone be with their own bliss.
But the real truth is, I probably don’t wanna be too happy or content. I’m still actually enjoying the quest, the search. Because the more lost you are, the more you have to look forward to. And there’s fun in that too, believe it or not. Yes, I get lonely too and I crave for intimacy but who doesn’t? And I know people who, while being in a relationship still does. Yes, it’s different. But only in degree and not in kind. I subscribe that I still don’t have all the answers and perhaps I don’t need them right now. I’ve got friends. I’ve got hope. And for now, it’s more than I could ask for aside from being better for what lies ahead.
More so, you’d be happy to know that there’d been a partial disenchantment on the side. You know how I used to embrace the idea that love and the right one will just come along even if I do nothing? It’s now overruled. But the idea of believing that it WILL come along it just takes some hard work, is sustained. Being a victim of my own choices partly because of the tendency to hold my head higher than my heart and another because of my stubborn streak, I’d like to think that things are a bit clearer now. I recognize my faults. I acknowledge my regrets and I resolve not to do them again next time. But for now, I’m still not in a hurry to be part of a pair until the universe deems me ready and brings me what is meant to be my way. We all have our moments to enjoy and I’ll enjoy them until it’s time to share them with another.
And on that note, may I leave you with my Random Movie Dialogue of the Day, from the movie Adaptation.
Charlie Kaufman: There was this time in high school. I was watching you out the library window. You were talking to Sarah Marsh.
Donald Kaufman: Oh, God. I was so in love with her.
Charlie Kaufman: I know. And you were flirting with her. And she was being really sweet to you.
Donald Kaufman: I remember that.
Charlie Kaufman: Then, when you walked away, she started making fun of you with Kim Canetti. And it was like they were laughing at *me*. You didn’t know at all. You seemed so happy.
Donald Kaufman: I knew. I heard them.
Charlie Kaufman: How come you looked so happy?
Donald Kaufman: I loved Sarah, Charles. It was mine, that love. I owned it. Even Sarah didn’t have the right to take it away. I can love whoever I want.
Charlie Kaufman: But she thought you were pathetic.
Donald Kaufman: That was her business, not mine. You are what you love, not what loves you. That’s what I decided a long time ago.
Even love unreturned has its own rainbows. Remember that.
Your Valentine,
-yas
Decam08 25, 2008
You must be in Law School if..
this is a repost from a facebook profile. Found it abso-freakin’-lutely true and couldn’t help laughing at some.
Law students and graduates, read on. 
You consider dropping out of law school approximately every hour, but after that first semester you realized you were already in too much debt to be anything other than a lawyer.
Substance abuse becomes you.
–caffeine tabs, coffee, alcohol and other substances…
The drama in your life now rivals that of high school.
You make adverse possession jokes.
You can name without hesitation at least three people who make you want to throw things at when you see them raise their hands in class. (THIS IS SO TRUE)
You don’t remember anything from the NIL except that that forgery is wholly inoperative. And that might be even incorrect.
You are truly and deeply unnerved by the thought of some of your classmates becoming attorneys.
You think tequila shots are essential to ordered liberty.
You wonder if that one professor who always seems angry and irritable and treats students’ minds as his personal playground is actually a sociopath or just didn’t get enough hugs as a child.
Sometimes during disagreements you are tempted to argue with complete legal basis the offending friend or family member without him understanding what you said.
You know and understand the complicated epistemological and metaphysical differences between a conspirator and an accomplice.
You know and understand the complicated epistemological and metaphysical differences between coffee and red bull.
You can’t remember if you decided to come to law school because you wanted to help people and make a difference in the world or because you just hate yourself.
You think whoever first introduced the Socratic method into the law school curriculum should have his face lit on fire and then beaten out with a rake.
You can’t think of any legitimate reason why a law student would need access to certain public records, but you can think of a whole lot of illegitimate ones.
When someone is expressing their frustration or anger about something that is in any way related to the law, you can’t be sympathetic because you’re too busy figuring out in your head if they have a cause of action.
You hear about the death of an elderly friend or relative and wonder if they died intestate.
You have considered changing career paths to hot dog vendor, stilt walker, or career alcoholic.
You’re pretty sure the reasonable prudent man is a friendless fool who still lives with his mother.
You use a highlighter when you read fiction.
You catch the cold from a sick classmate who did not want to miss the recitation.
You go to school but PRAY that you won’t be called.
You excuse bad behavior by saying “Good faith naman eh” and rarely would people understand you.
You use the words like:
‘alleged’ instead of ‘said’…
‘rationale’ instead of ‘reason’…
‘consent’ instead of ‘permission’…
‘accused’ instead of ‘suspect’…
‘compensation’ instead of ‘payment’…
‘termination’ instead of ‘firing’…
‘white unidentified substance’ instead of ‘shabu’…
‘carnal relations’ instead of ‘SEX’…
‘acts of lasciviousness’ instead of ‘molest’…
‘rescind’ instead of ‘cancel’…
‘maturity’ or ‘prescription’ instead of ‘deadline’…
‘imbecile’ instead of ‘stupid’…
‘insane’ instead of ‘crazy’…
‘intimidate’ instead of ‘bully’…
‘contract to sell’ instead of ‘reservation’…
‘illegitimate child’ instead of ‘bastard’…
‘brief’ instead of ‘short’…
‘digest’ instead of ‘summary’…
‘jurisdiction’ instead of ‘power’…
‘fruit’ instead of ‘profit’…
‘injunction’ instead of ‘order’…
‘vagrant’ instead of ‘bum’…
‘falsehood’ instead of ‘lie’…
‘defraud’ instead of ‘rip off’…
‘mediation’ instead of a ‘sit down’…
‘unreasonable’ instead of ‘asshole’…
you realize after 4 years that the girl/guy beside you was pretty/handsome after all.
And last but not the least
You go into a panic attack like you just heard the word “SUNOG!” when you hear the word, “SHUFFLE!”
Mayam08 25, 2008
Nowhere is Now Here
Ever noticed that sometimes, life’s profoundest changes take place within a very reduced time frame?
I was 23 years old in this so-called waking life when I got my share of experiencing my own Lost In Translation. I can’t exactly remember during that 7-day itch what truly happened except for its last night where I felt sluggish, exhausted and all out of love like Air Supply. Convinced that I’m afflicted with ill-humor, I’ve gone to a point where I even missed the Carebears. Where are the they when you need them the most? Way to go Yas!
At times like these, I’d like to secretly refer myself to as Bella Luna (moon lady) since I’ve been fond of staying up until the wee hours of the morning just thinking of anything and everything under the sun or in this case, the moon. But something inside tells me this night is not one of those. It seemed different. Like being in this state is not within my own volition. I know I really should get some sleep. My roommate left an hour ago leaving me all by my lonesome. Just me, my pillows and my stuffed animal.
For starters, I tried the counting sheep trick but I ended up losing my count somewhere and it’s causing too much mental traffic I had to stop before I start losing my mind. Lying awake, I listened to the radio instead but suddenly realized I am being bombarded with Love for Sale. A pre-packaged romantic bliss of speed dating and meet-your-perfect-match ado. Aaaah, February. Maybe, just what I need… Hmmmm…. ‘Nah, you’re just looking out for an easy escape out of this sordid emotional mess you got yourself into’, my mind snapped back. So I decided to dismiss the idea. And besides what’s the point of getting myself into something I’m not 100% committed to. It’ll be just another headache for all I know.
Anyhoo, since nothing I do is really working; I tried reading my old journals. Although I did it more out of a devout wish to soak in nostalgia than lull myself to sleep. And therefore it should come as no surprise that I came out drenched with remembrance of things in the past. Good, fun-loving memories and all those cries of whys and why nots trickling and dancing upon my now aching head. Damn, I swear I just made things worse. In my attempt to pick up my mood, I put on my Explosions in the Sky CD. It’s a delicate ambient blend of emotional rock similar to that of Coldplay without vocals. Perfect for attaining that relaxing, natural high I so wanted this time. Behold, what music can do for you. It can either send you singing, relax you to dance, into a flight or just mouth along and play an invisible instrument. This time, I just let the music send me adrift and saturate my thoughts. Sometimes, all you need is a quiet moment. silence your thoughts and just let the subconscious of the world do the rest.
And so in no time I was off to the pastoral world of pleasant relaxation. And then a strange thing happened. All of a sudden, I was looking at my own reflection in a proverbial mirror. Dazed to see those tired, weary eyes of mine, while gradually feeling old. It was a piercing consciousness that I’ve wasted two years of going around in circles, trying to portray the role of a good daughter and that of rebel without a cause. The internal struggle I’ve been battling inside unleashed its fury. I have never been this angry and mad at myself like this before. I thought I was carefully balancing the right things to do. Both roles however led me into a false sense of security that left me totally unprepared for life. I wasn’t even sure whether I wasn’t able to cope up with my emotions of losing a father figure or I’m just suffering from a quarter life crisis or both. All I know in the end I found myself running after dreams that brought me more tiring sorrows than sweet rewards.
As I was being slammed back to life, I knew I have to redeem myself in anyway I can. I then tried all possibilities of experiencing rebirth. Reminding myself of where I am, what I’m doing here, how important and unimportant I am and everything is, how simple life should be and so on…
At last, there comes a moment when we least expect it where life dares us to move on and test our courage and willingness to change. And oftentimes it does not wait. Either you go along with it or you don’t. I was reminded of Mraz’s song Life is Wonderful. Indeed it is. And despite all the negative things there is to say, the world works the way it works now and there’s not much we can do about it except that we learn to have fun along the rotating run of it. As they say, things change. Roll with it. And that’s just the way life is. You win some. You learn some. At the end of the day, I figured that what’s important right now, in addition to my newfound love of being a working student is to be in love with what I do, how I do it and with whom. What better place to say this than right here, amongst students of law who also share the same experience of sweet torture. Hopefully we all have fun taking part with the process. Ciao for now and later lovers.
-originally published in Arellano Law Gazette, year 2004
A Battered Woman’s Defense
In early Roman laws, a man could beat, divorce or murder his wife for offenses committed by her that dishonored him or threatened his property rights. In fact, women themselves were seen as property. In 16th century Europe, a man is allowed to kill his wife without penalty. By contrast, a wife who killed her husband was penalized as if she had committed treason analogous to murdering the king.
These laws, among others, reveal that early civilization then has authorized men’s use of violence against women to chasten them. It was in 1910 when different states passed reform legislation classifying wife-beating as assault. It was not long ago that a woman cannot choose a profession that may interfere with her duty as mother and wife including sexual submissiveness.
Today, the reality is that it is still behind closed doors that women were regularly abused physically, mentally, emotionally, or sexually. In a recent survey conducted by SWS, about 2.l6 million Filipino women are reported to have experienced at least one form of abuse, mainly at the hands of their husbands, partners or boyfriends. From 1991-1997, 59.8 percent of the cases reported at the Department of Social Welfare and Development are cases of woman battery. A promising development is the passage of Republic Act 9262 or the Anti-Violence Against Women Act, making domestic violence a distinct crime. It provides that “victim-survivors who are found by the courts to be suffering from the ‘battered wife syndrome’ (BWS) do not incur any criminal and civil liability” even without any justifying circumstance under the Revised Penal Code. This Act is expected to provide more protection to battered women as it includes “protection orders” that would require a suspected abuser to keep a certain distance from the complainant. Moreover, the coverage of this provision extends not only to wives but also to other women involved in any form of relationship. It cited four acts such as physical, sexual and psychological violence, as well as economic abuse.
In the landmark case of People vs. Marivic Genosa, the Supreme Court defined battered women as one “repeatedly subjected to forceful physical and psychological behavior by a man in order to coerce her to do something without concern for her rights.” Here, the High Court recognized BWS as a mitigating circumstance. The Court remanded the case to the lower court and recommended the clinical confinement of the accused to better assess her state of mind at the time of her husband’s killing.
As argued by women’s rights lawyer Katrina Legarda, who volunteered her legal services, Genosa did not use “treachery” in shooting her husband while he slept. She merely employed self-defense in protecting herself (she was pregnant during that time) and her children. The High Court gave weight to the account of an expert witness, a psychologist. However, the Court maintained that the existence of the syndrome in a relationship does not establish the legal right of the woman to kill her abusive partner and that it must still be in the context of self-defense. As a result, the penalty for the crime of parricide was merely reduced with the Court noting that “at the time of the killing, Genosa was in a state of uncontrollable burst of passion so powerful as to overcome reason.”
Nevertheless, the case sets a legal precedent and opens the door for the recognition by the courts of the latest development in psychology and mental health. Gabriela, a known women’s rights advocacy group in the country, feels that this case is a victory for all women, Filipinos in particular. The group has been espousing women’s right for so long at the grassroots level offering health, counseling and paralegal services. In an interview, Tinay Palabay, Gabriela Deputy Secretary General, has called on all women to a “greater task of asserting ourselves.”
BWS is based on a psychiatric disturbance called post-traumatic stress disorder. The common question is why does a woman stay in such an abusive relationship. Factors ranging from financial to emotional reasons have been cited. The victim may choose to stat because of fear of reprisal, shame, embarrassment, guilt or false hopes that things change sooner or later. Some feel that they must stay to protect their children or maintain the financial security offered by such ties.
The proper use of this defense is to understand the state of mind of the battered woman at the time she fought back against her abuser. It is not an insanity defense. Its purpose is to show the court the judicious reason to why she committed the crime. The requirement of proof of imminence and reasonableness must still be met. However, finally allowing the truths about abuse and what and what it does to the victim is a good start. The recognition of truth demands an acceptance of responsibility among us. Senator Francis Pangilinan said in a statement, “It is ironic that in our society women are usually seen as pillars of the household, yet in their own homes they are usually victims of violence.”
The real barrier is in the fact of our indifference and bigotry in these times of selective ignorance. Without the acceptance of this truth, the only winner is the tragedy of being unresolved. These reasons and the prior violence as part of woman’s state of mind is critical to her defense to the court as well as to the community that denied her equity in traditional culture. It’s hard enough to keep a sane mind in a healthy body, what more in an abused one? Let us not punish the victim by ignoring the injustices of abuse making it all the more destructive for her. As Chinua Achebe said, “A real tragedy takes place in a corner, in an untidy spot when the rest of the world is unaware of it.”
-originally published in Arellano Law Gazette
a GIANT tale
Indeed, the Philippines is far too beautiful to stay in one place. I am overwhelmed by it all. This year, as has been the annual hoopla, a group of six disparate and “single” individuals (as someone from the group likes to refer it) took it gigantically. Literally and figuratively. You’ll know why. The original plan was to visit Potipot Island in Zambales but after a slight turn of events we eventually decided to go for Plan B. Initially, I was a little upset as the amount of bucks I have could go only for the original plan. I was worried that I might not be able to go. Being a full-time student surrounded with yuppies can make you a perennially broke individual y’know. And then big-hearted Noyli and Jayson came to the rescue and so suddenly we were all thrilled at the fruition of our most fervent fantasy for the long vacation.
We took the night trip, slept most of the time so the 11-hour bus ride, didn’t really give us much pain in the arse. hehe. In the morning though, still half-awake we were able to get a glimpse of provincial folks with their rural way of life, living in houses oblivious to the fact that it’s in the middle of nowhere. Much simpler than people living in the city. Thinking about it makes you either go wishing your life was rather just as simple as them or be grateful that you had this stressful yet fulfilling job to make you feel important. A self-stamped validation of what you have achieved accomplished and amassed. Makes you truly wonder, what really matters. But let’s save that for another topic.
After a series of wacky misadventures, (yes, series not just isolated ones) we finally got to see the illustrious and almost flawless perfect cone beauty of Mt. Mayon in Albay. It really is breathtaking despite the Cagsawa Ruins few kilometers away from its ground which reminds you of how nature unleashes its fury. Seeing Mt. Mayon was kind of surreal. I mean after seeing it too much only on elementary textbooks and postcards, its real life perfect glamour could easily rub out all your acquired cynical conjectures about it. We were left with nothing else to do but to take pictures of it, perhaps wishing to capture the whole experience in photo. Or even a facsimile thereof. But you see, trying to capture everything in a still image never do justice. Certainly, there are things that are meant to be experienced with your full senses. The kids who were there trying to show tourists how to make illusions out of their pictures was fun.
After taking pictures to our heart’s content and since time is a lost friend of ours (blame one of the wacky misadventures), we took off right away and head ourselves off to Donsol, Sorsogon. We got there late in the afternoon so we decided to spend the night off doing something that doesn’t require much energy. There’s this collective excitement building up for every hour that pass as it gets closer to the time that we’ll be meeting the gentle giant, Butanding. (FYI, this is the biggest whale shark in the world) And so, that evening we went off firefly watching at some river. (Sorry, forgot its name) and boy, did we saw thousands of them. Full moon, firefly-lit river while on a boat and the incredible stillness the night represents, it was stunning.
Enter next day, this time we couldn’t hide our excitement. We hurriedly got ourselves ready, immediately hired skin diving equipments, even skipped breakfast and almost in no time we were already on the boat with our Bioman, Mang Gerardo. Just in case you’re wondering, Bioman is a nickname for Butanding Interactions Officer. Now as we were happily listening to the tales and accounts of Mang Gerardo, the Spotter in the middle of it announced a sighting which aroused us off our seats and gone berserk. It was all too fast. Now this chronicle is just the tip of the iceberg for me, since all the while when this is all happening I have a little battle of my own going inside me. I don’t know how to swim. It’s my first time in open water and my first time to go snorkeling. What motivated me to do it, only heaven can tell. And so with a life vest on I jumped in, leaving all my worries and fears on the boat. Ok, not exactly. My other hand was tightly clasped around Mang Gerardo who was kind enough to guide me. Hehe. And finally, finally I got to see the famous whale shark. It was unbelievably huge and beautiful and I was smitten. It seemed that there was an undeniable force of animal magnetism that she somehow exudes and I couldn’t help but to succumb to its allure. And then I whispered something to her telling how thankful I am for letting me bask in her awesomeness for the few moments we had. For three hours, the Gentle Giant was obliging enough to show herself four times. Cute show-off. and of course, we don’t mind at all. This experience left us all captivated, overwhelmed and rejuvenated. It is indeed a giant experience. It really is. After that, we found it really hard to leave Donsol. We’d like to repeat the experience and this time, in slow motion. To get moving though, we suit ourselves that this won’t be our last. After a hearty lunch, we got ourselves ready for another long ride off to Caramoan Islands in Camarines Sur.
It was already late when we get to the ferry boats station that will take us there. Now as if to balance our beautiful experience at Donsol, this time we were out of luck. Our planned island-hopping to these islands were ruined by what-perverse-stroke-of-fate-would-arrange-it so that the popular reality tv show “Survivor” was shooting there at the Gota Beach, our exact white sand beach location in the itinerary. It was however disguised in a public notice as “massive development.” Hopes still up that by some miracle we would be able to go to Gota, we settled ourselves to the 30-minute boat ride island of Aguiringan in the meantime. instead of one and a half more bound to Gota. It was a little unsettling, since we were all willing to travel a not less than 10-hour ride from Manila to get to it, even carefully spending money during the whole trip to make sure we don’t compromise this one. But by the time, we set foot on Aguiringan, by golly! it is nothing less of a paradise either. It was an unspoiled haven in every sense of the word. No hotels, no houses, no electricity. Only one comfort room for the whole island and I won’t even go to the details as to how it looked like. It was wild! We arrived there at about 8pm-ish and there were probably around only 20 people on the whole island. I couldn’t describe the feeling when I got there. Imagine a windswept island, a desolate white beach under a star-filled and full moon-lit night surrounded by calm sea and the whispering mountains. It was almost magical. I’m glad we didn’t entirely lose heart over the Survivor thing. Indeed, good things come to those who hustle. After being mesmerized and calmed down by this island’s charms, we decided to kill nothing but time and spent the night off exchanging stories we promised to leave there. Hah. And then something happened while I was having my call and response to the moon in appreciation of its mystery and companionship, suddenly _______’s face was there smiling at me and oh, I think just winked at me. Lovely. I blew him a sweet little kiss in return. Haha. Ok, that didn’t really happen. I just made that up for the romantic suckers. Sorry. Seriously now, that night was my first attempt to arrange and re-arrange the stars which by the way looked so untidy that night. Go figure.
Lying on the sand made me feel like the Earth was caring for my being there as if massaging my spirit and that I was absorbing some of its energy while I’m slowly adapting to this way of life. I’m stoked to be here.
It was not long after that Noyli and I, along with Jayson and Jhoms felt it has gotten seriously cold we decided to end the moonlight-staring contest and shelter ourselves in our temporary encampment. Tin and Jil were already dozing off. Now this is definitely part of the adventure. Remember, there were neither houses nor hotels here, and our “co-islanders” have brought their own tent and we have none. And so we settled ourselves with the little cottages they have here. And OMG, it was friggin’cold. We didn’t get much sleep, understandably. But after seeing much beauty, we’ve tolerated our fair share of torture until the wee hours of the morning. We were up early. I like this time of day when the earth in the morning had a night to cool off in the darkness and how before the sun actually comes up there’s this enjoyable period when the Earth is lighting itself up anxious to get spinning again. Now I just wanted to take hold of time, nail it down and keep myself at a standstill. It is just too pretty around here. I took a moment to take it all in before I split again. I tried to capture the moment in my head determined to carry these memories back to mainland. And I did.
–originally published, April 4, 2008
happy beheading day to y’all
For this season of drawing hearts, I’m officially back to my old tricks again. Trying desperately to be romantic with my true love, writing.
Fun Fact: Birds choose their mates in Mid-February. hmmm..
I’ve read somewhere that St. Valentine is honoured for continuing to marry lovers without the approval of the Church. He was busted and beheaded on the 14th of February.hence.
Anyhoo, I’m writing because I made this awesome realization that it’s never too late or too early to really start sharing and stop feeling so shy and foolish about loving myself or another. Y’know how we sometimes get caught up in trying to understand how it works? Well, come to think of it. It’d be much easier to just love love love love.
I know what you’re thinking. You think I’m in love? That’s funny. Of course I am. With you, silly. with Science of Sleep, with my three cute little puppies I only get to see on weekends, coffee shops that’s open until the wee hours of the morning, with new vocabularies, with wordplays, with the moon (and the way I’ve been thanking her for being a friendly stalker for years the same way I thank my lucky stars), with my coffee now grown cold, with cheesecakes and for being able to wear a silly grin and when asked why, just shrug.. with everyone that’s patient and allowed me to grow, adjust, regroup and fall in love while I tolerated my fair share of torture.
Anyhoo, whilst being bombarded with pre-packaged romantic bliss of speed dating and other love-for-sale activities, let me at least throw a Happy Beheading greeting to you and your loved one(s).
And for loners like me, may you be successful in finding your bird.
Your Valentine if you don’t have one,
lady-loves-a-lot
other possible title for today’s entry:
*the more I’m single, the more I blog about it. (toinkz!) :p
please don’t let me be misunderstood
I’m glad I’m still in the learning process. I’ve always believed that it is indeed ourselves that is our greatest nemesis. and thank goodness I’m figuring all this out again.. there’s plenty of work left for betterment.
happy that we can always snap back at life’s disappointments and say: “sure I suck, just give me some time and watch me kick your ass later!”
romancing the stoned
I was about to get real busy and then chase that flurry of hurry when my friends since high school planned a trip to Puerto Galera. It was definitely not in my plan. But in my mind, I knew I was still short of my healthy dose of rest and relaxation. I’m dreaming of being lost in paradise on a private tropical island. And so, not surprisingly, at the last minute I decided to pack my things. During travel, we barely spoke with each other. we were all tired I guess or trying to reserve some energy for what lies ahead. Upon alighting from the ferry boat, I immediately took off my slippers, my feet aching for the feel of sand. It was only then that I felt I was really away from the city, and from all the routine.
At around noon, my good friend and I decided to take our thirst for solitude a li’l further. We took long walks until we reached the end of the island and walked again to reach the other end, as if those long walks were a metaphor for me in wanting to leave something behind.
Evening came, and this is where the heart of the story came to unfold. We went to Coco Aroma bar, drowned ourselves with a pitcher of “Mindoro Sling”, and the band started singing Bob Marley originals. I knew then it’s gonna be a magical night. I danced the night away until the music relaxed my whole being and realizing that someday I would know the answers and will blow my expectations away. It was a liberation. I’ve never felt so free like it since I can remember. It was almost a total surrender to the inner spirit. abandoning all fears, doubts and traces of feelings of insignificance I never even knew I had. sometimes I close my eyes, trying desperately to be more in commune with the sea and the air I was breathing that moment. I open my eyes, look up in the heavens and the blanket of stars seemed to envelope me with the comfort of its strangeness. Needless to say, it was full of wonder. I knew, again that I was in love. Maybe I fell in love with his voice or with the songs played that night, maybe it was the ambience of the place, or perhaps the affair of the moment of throwing myself out there at the right time. some cosmic connection maybe. And I wonder why I’ve never been here before and when i’ll be back. I wonder if the sound of the waves will be just as gracious the next time.
![I keep holding on [Explored]](http://static.flickr.com/7097/7309045590_eb4be7eaca_t.jpg "I keep holding on [Explored]")
